An Ode To The Blogosphere

August 12, 2010

Its going to be two months since I started blogging.  When I began I was alone, all alone, quiet, very quiet. But inside of me there was a turmoil, a storm, a stream of questions troubling me all the time. I was disoriented, middle age crisis?! ( now I wonder).  I was obviously unhappy, with myself, with my situation, basically myself.  Looking for an anchor in life to hold on to. I was slipping deep, I was slipping deep into depression.  The nothingness, this loneliness was killing me silently.  No, don't get those ideas, I have a lovely family, a good job, a comfortable lifestyle.  God has been kind, He made me suffer, work and wait, before He gave me the material comforts that I wanted for a normal (middle class) life.

So, in my unhappiness, I applied for a distance learning course, (I have to appear for the Entrance Exam also). Then began to read some books.  I read Caulo Paulo's Veronika Decides to Die (title was really appealing to me!) and the Alchemist,  I loved the books.  Then the third book was and is Eat, Pray Love by Elizabeth Girlbert.  You must be knowing there is a movie coming up featuring Julia Roberts.  This book brought out a change in me!

The author, known as Liz by her friends, and now by me too, was depressed, very very depressed.  Ah, she was much more depressed than me! A divorce, no children, and then a breakup.... ah serious heart ache..... Liz was crying, she was crying in the middle of the night, sitting in the bathroom like mad.  Suddenly, I could relate to her, I too was depressed!

But then she decides to go on a tour, all alone to Italy, then India and then to Indonesia.  She travelled, she ate, she prayed, and now she is in love in Bali! (presently I have finished the book till here)

Anyways, I started feeling better after reading her, seeing her so depressed. (So next time You are depressed, find another person who is more depressed than you, and you will feel better!) I made friends with her actually! When she stayed in Ashram in India, she became very spiritual, she learned to meditate (I already know it wow!), she introspected about her failed marriage and her failed relationship.  She learnt to forgive her ex-husband.  She transformed as a human being, I mean she felt a change of heart.

I would read the book, in the morning before going to work, and at night before I slept, sometimes early morning.  One night I even dreamt about my life, on the lines of the story. I knew I was living the book.  Her simple style of writing and understandable words ( I never used a dictionary for a single word) inspired something in me.  I wanted to express like her, I wanted to write about the small and the big things around me, about the things I learn, about the things I love and hate, just like her.  Something in me kept on churning,  my mind was on fire.  I already knew about blogging, it was not new for me.  One day I decided I want to write my blog.

And that was 25 June 2010, when I wrote my first post.  I was all alone, no friends here, no one knew RESTLESS existed, in fact she was just born, there were no joyful words welcoming her arrival (that was just a joke OK!). Then I wrote a post saying that I am a self talker, as there were no readers at that time. I had decided none of my friends or known people to be here, so that I can speak my heart and mind out without the consciousness of they being around or their watchful and curious eyes weighing my words and reading between my lines (our own people can be so judgemental  sometimes, what do you say?).

But today, Now , I am a happy, mentally and physically occupied person.  Feel elated because I have a medium to reach out to other people and share my thoughts with them. I am so grateful, I have a blog, Internet, a PC (or may be in the reverse order!), I am so thankful, I have made friends with so many blogger pals Purba, Divz, Addy, Varsha, Restless Souldier, Desi Girl, Vee, Sharbouri and many more with whom I interact through commenting and on forums. There are many many more bloggers with whose blog I like, and I interact frequently, they are becoming my friends slowly. 

It changed my life completely.  Its unbelievable for me. I am a happier person, though the challenges of life don't leave you, but somewhere I know I have a little world of my own, where I can write about My World My Perception.

Thanks to all my readers and my followers and the ones I follow for their support, their patience to read my rather long posts and giving their time to me to write those valuable and sometimes very lovable comments. 

A Restless Heart With
A Sensitive Mind !!!


UB said...

Wow! Congrats on your(going to be) two months on blogging :) I've recently started too..I know how it feels..Just fabulous..Imagine what you'd be like after a yr :)

Niket said...

I read it 2 times!
The 1st time I read it, I found out that you have used 'its' erroneously in the very 1st line of your post! :)
The 2nd time I read it, I found out that you have repeated the same mistake in the 2nd line of the 2nd last paragraph of your post! :P
It should have been it's (it is) in both the occasions!
And I hope this is a valuable and a very lovable comment! hehee...

Sharbori said...

Do you know what I like most about your and your writing? your great spirit which comes through your writing.

I have also read veronica decides to die! nice book. your post also reminds of the other movie "under the tuscan sun" where the heroine after a bad marriage break up goes to Tuscany, Italy and finds a new life there. very touching.

Mag[m] said...

nice post restless.... "I was all alone, no friends here, no one knew RESTLESS existed..."

dont feel alone dear....u can consider us as a friend :)

Anu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anu said...

ok! I've been reading and commenting on your blog in the recent past! But this lets me understand more about you Restless. It's like a open window to reach you! Great post!

Vee... said...

Yay!! i made it to your list :P You have great talent of expressing things through your writing. Automatically people will read your posts! :D

p00ja said...

This was very touching very personal.
And what you said about people who know us are judgmental rings a very true bell in all of us.
Each one of us has his or her dilemmas in life, but as soon as we are at peace with our selves, these become mundane occurrences.
How we feel is in our hands, but for that we need a peaceful heart, not a restless one.
So I guess its time for you to change something.
We'd rather know you as a sensitive and sensible mind than a restless heart.
Take care.

varsha said...

Thanks Restless for being this sweet,naive but always genuine,speaking from the heart presence on the blogosphere!!
Blogging is indeed cathartic and an amazing therapy and blog pals as well as acquaintances have a way of putting a smile on your face at times!!

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

@ UB - U r right dear! it feels amazaing!!hmm let me think one year.... wow!

@ Niket - oh dear u had to read it twice! and ooooppppssss for that silly mistake,will correct. Definitely, its a sweet and lovable comment! thanks!

@ sharbouri - thank u so much. I didnot know that though! am blessed to have a blogger pal like u!

@ Mag(M) - thanks Mag! as always ur comment is so sweet!

@ Anu - Hey Welcome to My World My Perception! hmm i try to be honest in my posts, yes its an open window to my mind and soul! thanks dear!

@ Hey Vee - yes U r in the list!!look forward to more interaction on blogging in future too!

@ Pooja - u r here after a long time, welcome! Yes, a peaceful balanced mind is better anyday, and i dont have one! so wanted to be honest and hence named it Restless. May be as the time passes, i will be more at peace, when pals like u are around, definitely its going to be a intersting journey!. thanks Pooja.

And yes Pooja, am glad others also think the same way, that our own ppl get judgemental.

@ Varsha - U welcome Varsha, its always nice to get a comment and that truely heels a unhappy soul.


RS said...

Hey Lady,

that was indeed a touching post!
you are right - there is this nice feeling of kinship within the blogosphere circle that we are in.

thanks for counting me amongst your blogger pals...

as they say 'blog-te-raho'


Sanjeeta kk said...

Best of wishes for you. Hope you become stronger and more confident and come up with your best in the Blogosphere.

vini said...

Heyy Restless,
Just came across your blog, very natural and admirable. :-)
The statement about depression is kinda well-based. More than others' depressions, it is the way people face their problems that gives us the inspiration to face ours and keeps us going..
Great to stumble by your space..
Hoping to catch you again.


Reema said...

I m glad to hear that blogging gave u so much confidence and strength. I too had taken up blogging during a bad phase of my life and it had really helped me in the same way.
I am replying to your comment here. I shifted to WP way back in 2008. Most of the bloggers I followed were of WP and had difficulty posting comment in blogger. Also somehow SEO (search engine operation) works better for WP blogs and WP get more hits!! Blogger just has the benefit of Javascript widgets and all..thats it. Most of the older bloggers use WP.
I had shifted after 8 months. As you are new, it will be better if you shift asap.

Vee... said...

its surprising to see how much you've achieved through your blog in a period of 2 months. you know when i started blogging? about 4 years ago. but i was on and off in the blogosphere. keep writing more stuff, you sure'll have me as ur reader.

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

@ RS - right, we don't know the real identities of ppl, but still their presence matters to us, nice to be here! thanks pal!

@ Dear Sanjeeta - thanks!

@ vinni- Hey dear! its such a lovely feeling when someone finds ur blog coincidentally and loves it too! thanks a ton and welcome to My World-My Perception.

@ thanks Reema for replying to my querry. will c to it.

and oh u also started that way, hmm. tc.

@ Vee- its always nice to hear from u! hmm for a moment, i felt elated to know this... made my day!!


Purba said...

Blogging is a cathartic experience. And it's a wonderful way to connect with like minded people. Thanks for mentioning me :))

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

@ Purba - u welcome dear! my pleasure!

Vikram Karve said...

Dear Restless,
Blogging is uplifting, isn't it... and now you have so many friends...
Happy Blogging

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

Yes Vikramji, blogging changed my life! thanks!

Addy said...

Hey! So sorry to be writing so late! I kinda didn't check it! My bad!
Wow! Great story, its good making someone happy, but changing their life's perspective and bringing the rainbow...(getting a little melodramatic are we :P)
anyway! loved the post! and obviously love your blog!
Happy Blogging!

PS; Thanks for the mention!

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

Hey Addy! Melodramatic, are we?!
thanks! :)

Pranab said...

wow !!
what a expression .. beautiful !

Indianhomemaker said...

Started reading this post because I loved the title, and what a heart warming, delightful post it turned out to be!! I have not read 'Eat, pray, love' yet but am definitely ordering it right now!! And I think the blogosphere does this to many of us (maybe all of us).

RESTLESS said...

Pleased to read ur comment dear IHM :)

U'll love the book!

Yeah, blogosphere does this to many of us, who write from their heart :)

tks for ur visit!

RESTLESS said...

tks Pranab!

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