I, along with all of you, have reached the last day of the year 2010. At each year end, I'm reminded that just after another month, I will be celebrating my birthday. My birthday still thrills me, as it used to when I was little girl. I still smile ear to ear thinking about the day and how I would be celebrating it and what the people close to me would be gifting me. I still smile and my eyes still shine thinking about it! Although, now I'm thinking of using an under eye cream to scare away those would-be wrinkles (did I say would be?!!)
Jokes apart, but, really this year is coming to an end. I'm trying to sum it up. Remembering what I was doing the last year at this time. What all happened this year in personal and professional life. I see some clear cut phases, devoid of the flow of time, the measurement of time. There were phases of joys and sadness, like a cycle which went on. Probably, now I'm used to it. Probably, now, at 35 I've learnt to see every problem as a situation. and every situation as an opportunity to learn and to grow.
I always wanted to say this, and today I'm saying it, but ironically, to the people who don't know me as a person. I'm thankful to all the difficult situations I've faced, because it is that testing and trying times, it's that difficulties of life and people related to my life which made me stronger, which made me sensitive and humane. (I say stronger and I say sensitive, in the same breath. Yes, you can be strong along with being sensitive, only if you know how to manage your sensitivities, which can be quite a pain!!)
I thank all of them who hurt me. If not for you, I would never have been able to question the meaning of life and would never have thought about searching for it.... my search is still on..... but am glad, that hardships pushed me to this level.... the level of being eternally RESTLESS.
Meanwhile, everybody is talking about taking a resolution for the new year. I ask myself, do I have a resolution for the new year? Nah! , comes the reply. Why wait for the close of an year to decide something about yourself. Each day, each new day, we human beings are capable of making amends in ourselves, capable of learning and capable of unlearning. So, I don't think, I need to take any resolve today.
The only thing I can do is to reaffirm to myself that it's fine being myself and that my thoughts decide what I am, (ie., we are what we think). So, I reaffirm to myself that I keep my thoughts pure and that I never intend to hurt or harm anyone.....
Having said that, let me tell you dear reader, a majority of which are the youngsters that Restless is not just about musing and pondering over things, Restless has got restless feet too!! I will be partying all night with close family friends and would be having a blast at the dance floor too!! But, that is just a part of the celebration, not THE celebration for me. If I had not expressed myself and my heart felt thoughts at this juncture and to this wide array of reader and blogger pals, I would have felt "frivolous", would have felt incomplete..... So, I sign off now.... you too get ready for the celebration!
Have a beautiful and blissful times ahead....
Have a Happy New Year 2011